Wednesday 29 July 2009

Four Birthdays and Two Funerals

I am afraid that I have been absent from Blogland yet again, but on this occasion it has not been due to problems with my laptop computer. Sunday of last week found us packing bags, yet again, for a brief visit down to Sussex, which involved a family reunion. It seems as if almost every weekend husband has either been getting bags out of the loft or putting bags away in the loft. My husband tends to be a throw everything in the suitcase at the last minute sort of person whereas I like to be organised and work from lists. So I dislike intensely having to pack at the last minute as I have to when husband does not get the bags out of the loft until shortly before we are due to leave. Although in some ways I have had to get used to it, but it does not stop me sitting in the passenger seat of the car and worrying about all the things that I might have forgotten and the constant need to be rummaging in bag which sits on the back seat of the car, to check that I have not actually forgotten anything. In the past we have between us managed to forget comb, hairbrush, toothbrush, glasses, sandals and shirts. Now that my navigational skills have been replaced by a satellite navigation system I need to keep the old grey cells active somehow and there was also the desperate need to take my mind off the tragic affair that we were to attend the following day.

So far this year we have been away six times for one or two nights. There was the lightening trip down to Sussex to collect my mother and bring her up to Cheshire. Then there have been two funerals. One for my aunt in East Yorkshire and the second last week for a child. It was the saddest thing that I have ever been to. Husand and I have been to three funerals in the last nine months, so I am hoping that as things are said to happen in threes that, that is now that. The other three trips away have been to celebrate three of the four 'big zero' birthdays that are happening this year in our family. The fourth is next month when my husband will be celebrating and for a change the family will be coming to us.



On the journey home from Sussex we stopped at RHS Wisley, for a quick walk around, where I photographed these lovely blue agapanthus which will always remind of the events of July 2009.

26 comments:

Ladybird World Mother said...

What a time for you. And how sad to go to child's funeral. Lets hope that 2009 takes on an upturn now... lots of love x

Sandi McBride said...

Here's to better times and fewer trips for anything other than the pleasure of it!
Sandi

Carol said...

Funerals are awful at the best of times never mind when it's for a child!! Heartbreaking!!

Try to focus on all the celebrations and I hope that the second half of the year turns out much better than the first half!!

C x

Maggie May said...

I just love Agapanthus but perhaps you could tell me why my pot grown one only has one flower this year. It might have been due to all the scaffolding causing shade earlier.

I am like you..... need to make lists and start packing early. I hate last minute things.
A child's funeral must be the very worst thing to have to attend. My heart goes out to the parents & relatives.
heres hoping for better things for you from now on.

Jinksy said...

I commend you for your forebearance in remaining married to a 'last minute merchant', when you are clearly the opposite! :)

cheshire wife said...

Maggie May - my pot grown agapanthus has never flowered. So your agapanthus is doing better than mine!

Jinksy - I do not think that my husband's packing habbits are grounds for divorce. We see eye to eye on most things.

Gilly said...

What a succession of sad occasions! I do hopethings brighten up for you now. (By the way, could you keep one suitcase or bag downstairs somewhere so you could pck in an organised way?)

I love Wisley. My sister lives very near and is a member so when I go to stay with her we always visit there.

Strawberry Jam Anne said...

CW - I am so sorry that you have had to attend the funeral of a child. My heart goes out to you and to the child's parents and all family members. It is something I hope I never experience. A x

CG said...

My husband won't get cases out of the loft early either!
i am so sorry to hear about the funeral you just attended, I hope happier times are ahead.

cheshire wife said...

Gilly - thank you for the idea but there is no space for suitcases in the downstairs of this cottage.

Marian Dean said...

I used to worry about having forgotten to pack something, now I am more of a mind to say, well, what we have forgotten must be easy to pick up from some local store, if needs be. and it usually is that way, in fact I forgot my warm cardi one time, and I went into a charity shop and bought one even better than the one I had left behind.
I hope the funerals are over for your family, and all the trips are pleasure ones from now on.
Love Granny

Jennyff said...

Mr FF and I are exactly like you and yours when it comes to packing and travel. I am packed well in advance and ready before its time to leave, Mr FF not. He seems to think its normal to hear your name being announced in the airport, last remaining passenger etc.
Sorry you are going through such sad times, hope life starts to treat you better soon.

Working Mum said...

You have been busy! I couldn't bear a child's funeral. How sad.

Hope the celebratory trips have been great fun and worth the stress of the packing. You'll just going to swap packing stress for hosting stress for your husband's birthday!

Jennytc said...

A child's funeral is so sad. I passed one near my house the other day. The little white coffin was being carried in a glass carriage drawn by four white, plumed horses. It was one of those 'I can't believe what I've just seen moments.'

French Fancy... said...

How come Jenny has a Mr FF? He's mine. Anyway...

I can't imagine a child's funeral - terrible, simply doesn't bear thinking about.

Glad people will be travelling to you for Mr CW's celebration.

Anonymous said...

A childs funeral, I couldn't bear it.
It is so unfair. Hope there are better times ahead.
X

Cheffie-Mom said...

I'm sorry about the sadness you have experienced lately, especially the funeral of a child. Hugs and Blessings to you.

JennyMac said...

Heartbreaking...I have only been to one child's funeral and it was tragically sad.

Akelamalu said...

I hope all your future trips are for nicer reasons than funerals.

I too like to work from lists when packing and insist on the cases coming out of the loft at least a week before we have to go!

Scriptor Senex said...

My heart goes out to the parents. They will have a very tough couple of years ahead of them. I hope they have lots of friends and family to help them out and to appreciate that recovery from the death of a child is a long process.

I know what you mean about the Agapanthus. For me, snowdrops are always associated with a child's funeral from 1987. That may sound a bit morbid but actually it is good to know that every year a particular flower gives us a special personal reminder of the child that died.

cheshire wife said...

Akelamalu - when we have a proper hoiday I also insist on the cases coming out a week before we go, but it is these short breaks arranged at a few days' notice that I find so difficult.

imbeingheldhostage said...

Those are lovely flowers, I'm sorry they trail on the ned of such a time. I hate packing last minute too. Here's to a better second half of the year for you.

Susie Vereker said...

Well, how about you getting your own suitcase down from the loft in advance and let husband do the last minute panic with his. I agree about packing lists, though don't always follow mine. Wish I did. (But, Jenny-husband-last-remaining-passenger that would almost be grounds for divorce.)
Seriously, CW, I am sorry about the sad time you've had lately. Let's hope for an Indian summer to cheer us all up.

Jan said...

I ALWAYS leave packing to last minute.
Once we went away and I had nothing but my children's clothes... ALL my own had been left in a bag at our door....

Rob-bear said...

Well, you've been busy. Tiring, travel is, even to good occasions. Even worse to attend a child's funeral.

I remember conducting a funeral for a child once -- only a few months old. I don't recall much of the service. But I do recall trying to console a couple in a hospital emergency department who had just lost the pride and joy of their life to a "crib death" -- SIDS. Not the kind of thing I ever want to repeat.

Gilly said...
This comment has been removed by the author.